Random Thoughts from this RHONJ.

"Are you sure your head ain't full of helium"- Joe (husband). This is why Theo and I love him, for these fantastic one liners.

Joke courtesy of my mom: "Is teresa wearing a turkey around her neck?" and guess what, that is exactly what it looked like, and to be honest, sorry, I prefer to have the veil over my eyes. I could never meet my turkey before I slaughtered it.
I'd rather chop Teresa's head off. Which, she was really taking her life into her hands, because that is totally what she looked like.

Good question sister person: who does walk around in a mink apron?? Oh Melissa, I think your fashion will provide so many good moments this season.

Guess what Melissa? That "where's my food bitch?" crap, that's an American thing. My great grandfather loved to cook. He did more cooking than my great grandmother- that's a more Italian thing. Everybody cooks, because everybody loves to eat. It's just how it goes.

What's "bisch-kotti" Kathy? I've been to Italy, it's still called "Biscotti", same as it is here. No need to European-ize it.

Ok Joe's sexual talk is really starting to creep me out. His wee wee must be really REALLY small. He's way over compensating. Who wants to come over to your house on Thanksgiving and watch you try to have sex with your wife on a mechanical bull? Who?

Why is Gia starting stuff with Vito and Lauren? What a little Teresa.

Mom: "Why does he wear a hat all the time? Is he bald?" YES he is a little bit. When they showed that flashback to her house warming party, and yes, he was thinning just a teensy bit. Maybe just enough to bother him. And did anyone else notice him (Joe, brother) tell Joe (husband) that he would make out with him drunk during that little flashback?

Kathy's fake tears are really starting to get to the eye rolling point. And she's still talking about that thing with Caroline? That was like two episodes ago.

Teresa needs to stop being so insane. I don't know how else to say it. No one on this show is a brain surgeon, and even they all know it.

YES. I am so excited, we're finally getting into the Melissa singing episodes. Always some of the most fun of any Housewives installment.
-CE
Photos courtesy of BravoTV