Dude, Where's Your Car?

Broken. Michael Phelps' ESCALADE is broken. Look at that thing- it's almost as messed up as his face. Boom roasted.

Phelps was speeding and ran a red light. Escalades are douche mobiles. Can't say I'm not glad it's gone, or surprised.

He is not injured, and there are no reports of anyone else being injured. He better hope so at least, or his career is toast. Or rather, toasted. Which is what he probably was. Lets start the countdown until that report comes in.
-CE
Photo courtesy of Perez Hilton. Not going to link that one- you know where it is.

What. The. Fug.

Michael Phelps. You are trying to get over the bong incident. Step one: apology, makes sense. Step two: growing a porn-stache? Serious. Seriously dude? No. We all know your face is fugly. Covering it up with that...thing is not going to help. We know what's under there.

Shave it.

-CE