Anna Paquin Covers Self Magazine.

I can't even BEGIN to tell you how much I love Anna Paquin's bathing suit in this spread. The whole thing is just the best Self cover I have seen for a while. Gorgeously put together, and of course Anna is awesome.

I've even been inspired to start eating healthier.

One question though- why is she holding this awkwardly large Pug dog? That looks freaked the hell out. I know she has dogs, but I can't remember if this is one of them. I hope so. If not- bad choice Self staff.

Poor puppy. Cute dress.
-CE
Photos courtesy of JJ.

K Stew Likes Being Alone.

It must have taken a hell of a lot of photoshopping to make Kristen Stewart NOT look awkward here.

I love her outfit. It's very, very un-her, so I'm sure it's Elle's idea, but I love it anyway.

On her loss of privacy: “Somebody knocked on my hotel room door and asked for a light, then said that they were a big fan. I was like, ‘Do you really need me to light your cigarette? How do you know what room I’m in?’ I can’t be by myself and I like being by myself.”
On criticism of her public manner: “I think it’s funny that when I go onstage to accept an award, they think I’m nervous, uncomfortable, and awkward—and I am—but those are bad words for them.”
On her red-carpet demeanor: “People say that I’m miserable all the time. It’s not that I’m miserable, it’s just that somebody’s yelling at me…I literally, sometimes, have to keep myself from crying…It’s a physical reaction to the energy that’s thrown at you.”

Who wants to be nervous, uncomfortable and awkward? Who aren't those bad words for? 

 

I really don't care what she does in her personal life, but she needs to stop pretending she's an actress- when I see her in a movie NOT awkward and uncomfortable, I will personally be the first in line to put her up for a Oscar. 

-CE

Photo courtesy of JJ.

Memoirs of an Idiot.

Will it never end? Miley Cyrus is becoming the girl John Mayer. Everytime I turn around she's saying and doing something stupid. Or looking stupid. Hence this magazine cover. Hence this quote, just take a look:

On her chemistry with Liam: “I think we’re both deeper than normal people—what they think and how they feel. He’s very grateful for what he has, but he doesn’t let it go to his head. I’m like that too.”

Miley Cyrus is as deep as...well, Teen Vogue I guess. So basically not at all, especially with teasers like, "Are You a Facebook Narcissist?"

 

She SERIOUSLY thinks that she is deeper than a normal person? She is an imbecile. So yes, in that way, she is not a normal person.

-CE

Photo courtesy of JJ.

The 3 Glamour Covers.

Zoe Saldana, Leighton Meester and Amanda Seyfried are all the cover girl's of this April's Glamour magazine.

I have to say- Amanda's pops the most. Definitely this cover is the best for me- except I still have a problem with the "pulling up your dress while also pulling it down" pose. So ugh.

Leighton just screams desperate to me, and you'll notice she is definitely the one pulling her dress up the most.

 While I like Zoe, she just seems a little awkward. Don't know what it is. I like her dress though, it's very Vera Wang Princess. 

“Most Stylish” Leighton on marriage: “If [marriage] was important to somebody I loved, maybe I’d think about it, but I don’t think that I’m the type. It’s not for me. I wouldn’t mind living together. [But] eventually I’ll have to get a separate house for my shoes!”
“Most Elegant” Zoe on her life: “I want to have more sex, travel more, drink more wine and love life… Don’t want to be any other woman but myself.”
“Most Down-to-Earth” Amanda on staying grounded: “There’s something empty about having your own VIP booth, and people staring at you, drinking and dancing—to get what?.. Maybe people [in Hollywood] wear really nice clothes, and they drive really nice cars—but that doesn’t make me comfortable. And if I’m not comfortable, it won’t be part of my life.”
-CE
Photos courtesy of JJ.

The Orange Point.

I hate orange. Ask anyone. The color makes me angry for some reason. Especially when it is worn by a person. It makes you look like a Flintstones push-pop. Not flattering.

People (aka my "friends") think I am crazy, but literally every time I see someone wearing orange I let out an involuntary "ew". It's led to some awkward cover ups. As in,

Friend: "What do you think of my new top?"
Me: "Ew."
Friend: "What?"
Me: "Eww... look awesome. Yeah, you look awesome."

Jessica Szohr proves my Orange Point. Cute, adorable girl- but totally insecure. Hence: orange. Someone was able to talk her into wearing this heinous color on the cover of a magazine, and while she can pull it off, it's not her best look.

Here's "The Orange Point": When I see orange, I see women in their mid-40s who are fake tanned and bleached blonde to hell desperately trying to hold on to their youth, sipping whatever mixed drinks by the pool, wearing their orange tops and tight white capri pants. Orange says "Notice me! My husband doesn't!"

Orange is insecure. Orange should be a garnish, not the whole meal.
-CE
Photo courtesy of JJ.

Tina Fey, En Vogue.

Tina Fey. Has anyone ever deserved to be on the cover of Vogue more? No. Am I confused by how Victoria Beckham has been wrinkling with the stress of never having been offered a cover, and yet Tina does it with ease, and at an older age? Yes. And delighted.

Victoria Beckham is cool, but Tina Fey is cooler, in a nerdy way.
-CE

Through the Looking Glass.

20 year old Aussie actress Mia Wasikowska sports a cropped hair cut on the cover of Teen Vogue this month, and speaks about her role in Tim Burton's upcoming "Alice in Wonderland" movie.

On her interpretation of Alice: “One of the things that was scary about taking on that role is the huge fan base; everybody has their own idea of who she is. So [Tim Burton and I] discussed, very early on, just being happy with her being our Alice…making her my own.”
On earning her roles: “I like getting jobs because I auditioned for them, because of my ability as opposed to my celebrity.”
On growing older: “As a teenager I was very anxious. I had a lot of energy and passion that I wanted to channel into creative things, and I always felt like I wasn’t achieving enough.”

She seems like a cute girl. I can't wait to see the movie- I feel like I've been waiting for it forever!

-CE

Photo courtesy of JJ.

Golden Girls.

 

This is cute. A little serious for someone her age, but classy none the less. Very Goldie Hawn, the early years.

She has what, I'm assuming will be a very crappy movie coming out with Kristen Stewart, the Joan Jett one, and...well, Kristen Stewart does not have my greatest confidence.

Love Dakota though- it's nice to see someone progressing through their teen years with a modicum of poise.

On the other halves of the covers release was another young star who possesses a great deal of grace, Gabourey Sidibe.

I can't even say how much I love her. So cool, so sweet. Such an inspiration for girls everywhere.

“All my life I’ve been hearing that I’ll never amount to anything until I am skinny, and she [co-star Mo'nique] disproved everything that everyone has ever told me.”

Love her. Such a cool, genuine person.

-CE

Photo courtesy of JJ.

THIS Is Really Bazaar.

Miley Cyrus looks gorgeous on the cover of this month's Harper's Bazaar. Which is to say, she looks absolutely nothing like herself.

Jeez, they classed her up. Damn. But why is the real question. Is she really someone their target audience wants to read about? Eh. Maybe. I mean, maybe they were desperate...and she always is, so that would explain it. It also accounts for the lack of cowboy boots or jeans ripped open at the crotch.

Perhaps this is the beginning of a new Miley? HA. Yeah right.

On her new tattoo: “It reminds me not to take things for granted, I mean, breathing — that was something none of them could do, the most basic thing. And I put it near my heart because that is where they will always be.”

EARTH TO MILEY: Your heart is not under your boob. It's in the middle of your chest. But I guess she covers it by saying 'near'. I could get a tattoo on my ankle and claim the same thing, right?

Then there is this:

I thought it was so cool when girls would ask me, What’s your shirt? And I’m like, Hanes, but I have $60,000 worth of jewelry on top of it!”

Oh yeah, she's just bein' Miley. A totally normal girl. Remember when they would claim she was on an allowance? HA.

-CE
Photo courtesy of JJ.

Jessica Simp...I Mean, Amanda Bynes.

Oh Amanda Bynes. What happened to you? Once you were a normal, fun, goofy girl, and now you look like a Jessica Simpson knock off. It makes me feel super ill, and I can't defend her anymore.

I don't really respect Cosmopolitan anyways. Eh, give me Marie Claire any day.
-CE
Photo courtesy of JJ.

One of Nylon's Best.

Hillary Duff must be thanking her lucky stars that "Gossip Girl" came around. Best career move since Lizzie McGuire. Magazine covers weren't exactly a dime a dozen before that.

Love Nylon. Their covers are really unique, and this one is one of their best. Love what she's wearing...so classic.

Yeah, I need to go run out and get this.
-CE
Photo courtesy of JJ.

Portman the Pothead.

Doesn't her face look weird here? Something about her eyes. Maybe it's just reached that point where it's a little TOO photoshopped, you know what I mean? Something just looks a little off.
I'm in love with that dress though- she wore something similar on the red carpet and I was dying over it. Here are some quotes from the article, turns out she's a pot head:

On being a late bloomer while attending Harvard University: “OK, so I didn’t really go to high school parties and yeah, I didn’t touch pot till I was in my 20s. I didn’t get flat-out drunk until I went to college. But I think that’s a good thing in many ways.”

On her rumored romance with Sean Penn: “He’s obviously someone I’m friends with I mean, not ‘hey, wassup?’ friends, but we were all on the [Cannes 2008] jury together—Alfonso [Cuarón] and Marjane [Satrapi]—and we had a really great time, and then…It was one of those things where you’re like, ‘Oh, my God! I’m that person who’s caught in this shitty rumor brigade.’ You can’t win. You don’t say anything and everyone’s like, ‘It’s true.’ You say something, and you’re keeping the story alive. It’s bad, bad news.”

Is it just me or does that last quote feel like kind of a name drop situation? Ok you're on the Cannes jury with Sean Penn, and you're tight. Real cool.

-CE

Photos courtesy of JJ.

Why is SJP Famous?

My family and I watched "The Family Stone" over Thanksgiving break. This is the conclusion we came to, and I must say, we disagree on A LOT (they're Republicans, enough said) but one conclusion we could come to is that Sarah Jessica Parker is ugly.

I know, it's mean, but there is something about her face that is just...off-putting. Nothing about her draws me in or makes me want to keep watching a movie. I watched "The Family Stone" for Rachel McAdams and Diane Keaton. I wanted to punch her off the screen every second she was on it. It infuriates me that it could have been such a better movie if someone else had been cast. She sucks the like-ability out of that movie.

I know there will be tons of "Sex in the City" fans who will totally disagree with me but...egh. Can't change my mind. Plus, she named on of her daughters Tabitha. Does she really have to make the witch jokes SO damn easy?
-CE
Photo courtesy of JJ.

Jenna's Shape.

Jenna Fischer showed off a sneak peak of her November Shape cover on Friday's Jay Leno Show. 

Love her. Love how Shape has a normal girl on the cover! They're pretty good about that, and smart too. I'd a thousand times over rather buy this than a cover of Megan Fox. If anything, I will NOT buy a magazine if she's on it. I don't want to read what she says.
-CE
Photo courtesy of Just Jared.